Sunday, February 1, 2009

Sick and Short-timers

Sherry's last day, too short to talk.
There she is tearing the last day off her short timers calendar.

For Lucy, Woody, Ora, Terri, and Debbie (and anyone else who ain't in FL,TX,CA,AZ &NM.)
NOw for today's sick entry!...........................................


Well, the weather here is fairly nice, sun shining, but will not get out of the 50’s. So go ahead and feel sorry for us. For some reason a cold just puts you in a bad mood. It will probably take a quart of Jack Daniels to get me out of this slump. Okay, so I lied, I am too cheap to buy Jack. Maybe Southern Comfort, nah, too cheap for that too. I heard mixing rubbing alcohol & water half and half and gargling helps. Don’t sound good. Maybe honey and alcohol? It is hard to gargle honey though.




There used to be a lot of jokes made when a guy ‘got short’ (term for one who has a little time left in the military or on the job). That produced the 'Short timers Attitude'. Also Just about everyone had a short-timers calendar. I made one for Sherry when she had a month to do, I put it in the garage, she tore off the days as she got in the car to head for work. I have her tearing off her last day in the picture above.
“I’m so short I could stand on my head and gargle p-nut butter ‘til get out!”
“I’m so short an ant can trip over me!”
“I’m so short I can’t even reach the s@%t detail list.”
“I’m so short I can’t reach the urinal.”
“I’m so short I see boot treads.”
“I’m too short to take a break.”
“I’m so short, my hat drags the ground.”
“I’m so short I need a ladder to climb on a golf ‘T’”




Right now my mind is so short I can’t remember any more. There was a time the fifty of them would come to mind.
It is a good feeling to be short on any job, when you are anticipating another. So about this cold, or crud, “I’m so short one more box of Kleenex should do it.”



(And the word Gargle brought all that junk up!)




Nite Shipslog
PS: TENNESSEE PEOPLE . . .



The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.

He called her into his office and said: "You graduated from the University of Tennessee , and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"






The secretary thought a moment, and then replied:















(scroll down)



























"Everything but my earrings."

6 comments:

Shirl 72 said...

Glad you all are feeling some better. Speaking
of retirement. I had the days, hours, minutes seconds, and amount of miles. Although I liked
my job I was ready to retire. Gargle with Hydrogen Peroxide that is a germ fighter and it will also clean your teeth.

Shirl

Ora said...

Happy Retirement Sherry...just know you will enjoy every moment...take care Jack...get well soon...God Bless you both...hugs...Ora

jean said...

Hi Jack, sorry you aren't feeling well hope you feel better soon. maybe it want be to long before it warms up. They say we will have colder weather here this week and not any snow this time. Lol. Take care, jean

a corgi said...

that was cute with the "shorts"; sorry you are under the weather though; hope you feel better soon

betty

Ally Lifewithally said...

Hope you get to feeling better soon ~ I am still laughing at taking "Everything off but my earrings." thanks for the smile ~ Ally x

Terri said...

Ahhh Retirement...enjoy every minute of it!

It was so cold without power my teeth were chattering for sure...lol

I've had a nasty cold or sinus infection and feeling under the weather as well...

Hope you are feeling better

Hugs
Terri