I have had it!

Have you ever said , “That is it, it is enough!”
I mean when you get so over weight you say, I have had it, I am losing this weight.
If you find yourself drinking a little too much, you say, I Quit!
You buy a pack of cigarettes, look down and say, enough, I quit.

I have held the dream of seeing a family restored. The divorce was mean. The reason was and was not justified. (if that makes any sense). I was told (by one kin to the In-law) that the marriage was over before the actual problem that broke the camel’s back. I am the hopeless romantic. I thought there was a chance, this can work. I held this dream of my ‘daughter in law’, the one who we really thought of as our daughter, would return to the family. We loved her as the daughter we never had. I admired her ability in the work place, she was successful. She is a beautiful woman. Shucks I wanted her back.

Our grandson Matt graduated this week. That is a family thing I think. I was disappointed that when the one I dreamed of returning to our family, brought her new boy friend. In a way I am glad. I can now wipe that dream out.

It is senseless to hope for something that is not going to happen. I was disappointed she did not fight for custody of her sons. I could not believe it. It was a shock. A lot of stuff went on as in any divorce, but this one was nasty. I still held on to the dream that ‘MY’ daughter in law would return to our fold. But this week, I settled within myself.’ Buddy-roe this ain’t gonna happen.’ She is happy away from your family and your son, you need to forget it and get on with life. So this week I am saying, I have had it. It was a beautiful dream but that is what it was, a dream. Now it has been put to bed. I sure love that girl though, the mother of Reece, Matt and Luke. I guess that is life. I am not saying she should not find happiness some place else, everyone has a right to happiness, I was just hoping it would be back at her old home.

And for sure our son is not blameless (I am not that ignorant), but he still cannot deal with the fact ‘She is Gone forever’.

So some parts of life I hate; some parts I accept. Finally I can accept this one, but it ain’t no fun!

This entry ain’t no fun but I had to make it to get it off my chest. Now there I have said it. IT is OVER!

Now again, Jack put the Serenity Prayer into action.

Thanks for letting me bore you with my heart, log, this is where I can say that I am hurt and relieved. Now if our son will start acting like a human again I can relax some.

Nite Shipslog
PS:
Next to Cancer, Divorce is the meanest word in the English language. Everyone hurts.