Saturday, September 23, 2023

I probably told you this…….

 Car of the day:  The '54 Chevy does not get much attention, but it was a nice car. That was the year I met Sherry Harris


So for today:

I am starting to repeat, I mean continuing to repeat myself.  I am a forgetful person also. If you read yesterday’s entry you will know I transposed 67 to 76 years.  If you did the math you would know I made a very terrible mistake (2023-1956= 67 not 76). But I do remember some things. They were ‘burned’ into my memory. We have never thought that our lives were so different as we traveled Frost's poem  “The Road Less Traveled By.” 

I have been asked the secret of a long marriage.  I wrote a book once called, “It can Last Forever”.  In it I tried to mention things that added to our marriage to keep it afloat.

I will say this in all humility and seriousness, the wife is the key. Looking back when I lost my head and did something stupid, my sweetheart many times swallowed her feelings and bit the bullet to keep us together. I am not sure, but I think in the case of Dallas and Marian, the same is true. The one who loves deepest, apologizes first!

My girl is a teetotaler. Once in our marriage I was drinking too much, over time it took its toll, and I moved onbase into the Chief’s Quarters. We were working in DC at the time and on the same floor in the Bureau of Naval Personnel.

After a few days she came to my office and asked if I would attend counselling with her. I agreed, she made an appointment.

At the Chaplain’s office he listened to our stories. I guess counsellors are supposed to nod, smile and steeple their fingers under their chin and appear to be listening. When we both had finished, he spoke.

“I can see where you have differences, Mrs. Darnell can you step outside in my waiting room I need to talk to the Chief a minute.”  Sherry stepped outside.

He looked at me with concern and aggravation. Waited a few seconds then said in a not so friendly voice, “Chief, what the hell is wrong with you?  Are you insane?”

I was shocked, a minute ago he was such a nice understanding minister. I couldn’t say anything.  He continued, “You have a wonderful understanding wife there. She loves you. All she is asking is that you attend church with her once a week, is that so hard?”

“No sir, but….”

 “Listen to me, I have men come in here with serious problems, yours is simple. Now get your ass in church next Sunday. I don’t care if you think of work or the football game coming up, but you ATTEND church with her, is that understood?”

“Yes Sir!”

He asked his secretary to send Sherry back in. This Jeckel/Hyde person all of a sudden was so stinking nice again, all smiles. “Mrs Darnell, I think we have this worked out, don’t we Chief?”

“Yes Sir!”  Again, but this time a little sheepishly.

“You two have a great life together, I don’t want to see you again under these circumstances.”

It worked!

I have probably told all that before. I am not sure of the chaplain’s religion, but since meeting Victor’s Father Ignatius, I think he was him! ;-)

 

Nite Shipslog

PS: This was too long and probably a repetition, but I just wanted to explain just one time I know that girl whipped my stubbornness and saved our marriage. She is the best!

 

3 comments:

Victor S E Moubarak said...

What a lovely story and what a wise Chaplain. Communication and understanding are so important in a marriage.

Thank you Jack for mentioning my Father Ignatius stories. Happy Anniversary once again, to you and Sherry. May God bless you both and your family also. Praying for you.

Mevely317 said...

I do remember (most of) this story, Jack ... but I believe it bears repeating. Your love story is remarkable, indeed. Maybe you could publish this each year on your anniversary?

BTW, I agree -- that Chaplin does sound like our Fr. Ignatius!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

Thanks for answering my question. I do agree, going to church together is a great thing and can hold marriages together. When a couple prays together they stay together! Glad your Sherry is such a wise gal and pointed you in the right dight direction. Love to both of you, you are so blessed to have each other. 67 years together to be admired !