Friends, it is all done with one little card. Yes when we checked aboard we were asked how we were paying our bill. Says I, ‘Tis all paid sir!”
Says he as he smiles, ‘Oh, dear (naïve) tourist, you must set up a cash account with us or give us your credit card number. You will surely want to buy something aboard, or at least leave your gratuities for the hard working crew. Cash is not accepted aboard ship. You must use the ships card’.
Says I, ‘we are wealthy Americans we deal in cash.’
Says He, ‘Then proceed to guest relations, get in that really long line, then give them a little of 'your cash' to set up your cash account.
My wise mate asks, ‘BUT sir, What if we use the credit card?’
Says He (Smiling REALLY big), ‘Then I can take care of it RIGHT here and you can proceed to the 11th deck for our free welcome aboard buffet.’
Reluctantly I handed the man my GOLD Aluminum PLATINUM & Tin VISA!
Asks He, puzzled, “Surely You both will not be using the same card?”
‘YOU BET WE WILL’, says SHE. (In other words sir, this boy ain’t buying nothing by hisself!”
One minute later we were on our way, each with a NEW plastic card called a ‘Sea Pass’.
The card is neat. It is your stateroom key, tells the dining room and table at which you will be seated; has your file number and some other secret stuff (that only they know about.)
Anytime you leave the ship they scan the card, and when you return they scan the card. Therefore electronically canceling out each other. The crew does the same. That way the captain knows she has everyone safely back on board. (NO! I have no idea what they do if they are missing someone.)
Everyone aboard was extremely nice. I ate watermelon and pineapple at every meal.
Let me know if you hear of a cheap cruise.
TEACHER: Debbie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.