Saturday, September 2, 2017

Leaving home (for the last time, Pictures from the internet)

 As we grow older, hopefully, we learn to think:

There is a big difference between a human being and being
human. Too many people do not understand that.

Getting too Old to cut the mustard!

My thoughts on saying goodbye to your home.

Not like a natural disaster or accidental fire destroying it, like it is time…… That time you have dreaded…. You cannot take care of yourself any longer.

You gotta love Jean down in Opp, AL. That girl will work herself until she has no work left.  You have to admire her spunk and abilities.

I have said many times, we seniors are very reluctant to leave our homes, as THAT time approaches. THAT TIME when we can no longer care for ourselves.  It must be one of the sadist times in a life, if our minds are still with us.  The fact is, once we take that step, 99+% of seniors will never return to that home.

I smiled at Jean’s entry, because if any of us will return to their home once it is left, it is Jean. She will go back because she must cut the grass. I am serious as I say that.

There is the 1% who are exceptions, but mostly as we leave, we know we are leaving our stuff, the majority of our clothes and shoes. Most of our pictures and Nick knacks will be left.  We will take none of our pots and pans. We ain’t taking that frying pan that has fried thousands of eggs.  We will no longer make a sandwich or cook a meal. We seniors are headed for the ‘Nursing Home’ or ‘Assisted Living’.  Most of your finances will be managed by someone else from now on.  You won’t shop for groceries or clothes again (most likely).

I am saying this because it is true. I know it. I have seen it.
We know if we live long enough it will happen to us. Our sons know, our wish is to be put in a nice place and come see us when you can. DO NOT LET US MAKE YOU FEEL  GUILTY!

Now BIL Dick had a great idea. He was planning to hire a proven trust worthy couple to take care of him and my sister. Move them into their home. He planned to pay them min. wage to take care of them.  He said his son would not understand, but at his death and the death of my sister, the house would go to the care takers.  He had it all planned, but he died in their motor home.  He died years before his plans were to take effect.  They were camping on the Blue Ridge Parkway doing what they loved, camping. One of the best men I have ever known.

 Do not get me wrong, it can be sad of course, but some folk welcome transferring that responsibility to someone else. I have met seniors that are happy in assisted living.

Stay tuned, tomorrow, I will try to brighten this picture up a little.

I know it is best NOT to know the end, but sometimes I would like to know just how much time I have left, so I could plan better.  LOL
We can always try to keep our BEST memories!

Nite Shipslog
 I hear today that because of Harvey, Gas prices went up!


Chatty Crone said...

Oh Jack - I know I am a little bit younger than you - but I have thought about these situations a lot. I had to put my mom in a nursing home - my niece and SIL worked there. I went every single day, but I still have nightmares about it. I couldn't life her. I hope I don't make my kids feel as bad.

Mevely317 said...

Somber subject, m'friend.

When my son and I moved mother from her home, we told a little white lie:
She could return anytime she'd like. (Funny, I almost believed it myself.) While she was initially happy making new friends in the care facility, I wish we'd paid closer attention to the signs of dementia earlier.

... To die doing that which you love. Pretty blessed, I'd say.

Rick Watson said...

We just lost an old friend that struggled with this issue. Even during the last days of his life, he talked of going home.

betty said...

I wrote about my Uncle John a bit back; how he was in a nursing home against his desire and how he wanted to go back to his house. He asked the doctors what he had to do to be able to go back to living on his own. Every requirement they gave him, he did it. He thought he was ready to go home, only to find in the meantime his children had sold the house (they had power of attorney) and he had no house to go back to. That defeated him. So sad. False hope.

My MIL when she went into assisted living, for days afterwards every morning she would take the pictures down from the wall of family members and be ready to go back home that day. Never happened.

I hope I go like Dick; going while I'm doing something I enjoy.



such a sad topic. but one we must confront one way or another.

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

I do hope the next entry is a bit more cheerful. Getting older does mean letting go of a lot of things and I've done that with my downsizing. I'm hoping it is the last move I make, but who knows. Every day brings changes and sometimes, surprises.

Lisa said...

I hope I never have to go to a rest home but some of those assisted living places are actually nice. I fear my income would never allow such a place. So, I plan to just be in a small house with little up keep when I get old. I do not want to have a lot of things that will have to be shifted through when Im gone.

Living simple

Unknown said...

I went every single day, but I still have nightmares about it. I couldn't life her. I hope I don't make my kids feel as bad.