Wednesday, December 28, 2011

A coon’s age

A southern expression is “I ain’t seen you in a coon’s age!” Meaning a long time. When that expression was coined no one knew how long a raccoon lived.


So I decided to look into sayings like that, our British friends say “In Donkey’s years”.  Donkey’s typically live 45 years.  We also like to say, “Ain’t seen ya in a month of Sundays!”  meaning a long time.


Donk, from Devon village

That brings me around the long way to my illusive subject today. Dogs age.  I have asked folks how old is your dog, they have answered, ‘in human years he is 45’. That formula is multiplying the present age of the dog by 7. There are more complicated formulas, but I am a ‘ball park’ kind of guy with figures.

Staffordshire Bull and Lily

I have never had anyone say, ‘my cat is 35  in human years’. That would mean the cat is about 7 yrs old.  formula is about  5 x actual age.

A cat typically lives longer than a dog, especially a big dog. Small dogs run a cat a good race in years, 17 to the cat’s 21.

There are more complicated formulae but these work for me.

So, with all that I got to thinking. How old am I in girl’s age? Ah ha. According to Gov’t statistics Women live an avg of 79.8 years, while men get 74.4. So my actual age in woman's years is 1.07258 times my age 73. “WOW, in women’s years I am 78.29838 yrs old. Now that I am Sherry’s ELDER, 78 yrs old I expect my senior discount, taken out in trade!!!”

I’m sorry, I know some of you don’t like FIGURES, (AS IN NUMBERS JIMMY, NUMBERS!). So when you say, ‘my dog is 25 human years old’. I am saying “I am 78 years old in girl’s years. Now I am going to need help getting to bed.”

I am ole

Thanks for putting up with my nonsense,

Nite Shipslog


 What we think, or what we know in the end is of little consequence. The only real consequence is what we do.

—John Ruskin



fully customized 1948 Chevrolet Fleetline. Notice hood ornament off and door handles shaved.


Anonymous said...

Sometimes it feels indeed as if time slowly passes by, currently however it rather flys. And yes, way too often feel like ten years older. A few days of rest ahead now during winter break.
A kind Thursday for you all.

Anonymous said...

I wonder how they arrive at the averages. Do you know what I mean? If those averages are "mean" averages, you realize they are throwing in the ages of men who die young because of reckless behaviour, are they not? So maybe, if you discount the men who die young because of high-risk behaviours, you're not as old as you think you are. ;-)
Just don't go bungee jumping!

Paula said...

Awww Jack I always look forward to your nonsense. I have a lot of it too and thats what keeps us young.

Anonymous said...

My parents had a sloped back Chevy at one time...but WOW it didn't look like that! Your nonsense works for me...better than paying big bucks for a magazine that tells me how to organize my space...I'd rather read your "nonsense"!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

I've used a lot of those expressions most of my life and really never thought about where they came from. Funny how we pick up so many of them. Age is all relative to me any more. My oldest son told me anyone over 60 is old. Doesn't matter to the younger folk if they are 60 or 80...we are all old. I thought at least he was truthful, but you know as well as I that someday he'll be old too. Anyway you look at it I'm enjoying life and lovin' it. Cold day here in Ohio but the sun was out for awhile.

shirl72 said...

My dog Chancy lived to be 21 years old. So
7 plus 21 is 147. She did have an easy life.
She thought she was a human. Haven't seen you
in a month of Sundays and I sure a few more.
I got lost in all the dog, cat and human years.



Now I have a bunch of new expressions to add to my vocabulary. Had never heard of any of them. Numbers and math make me crazy. Guess it doesn't matter how many years old you are. If you're LIVING and BREATHING, that's all that COUNTS. LOL Take care.

Lucy said...

When my second husband died his doctor called me when he saw Joe and my marriage license in the paper a quite a few years later. And he noticed I was older than Joe. He said that is good cause maybe we would die about the same time. Some congrat's huh.

Fred Alton said...

Hahahah! Thanks for the good laugh this morning, Jack. Don't you beat all? I love our southern expressions! You can be older than Sherry if you want to but as for me I'm gonna stay young. I'm still just a kid at heart. Feeling as young as a 15 year old heifer! (Think on that one.) ☻

Sheila Y said...

I love to read your ponderings. I like how your brain works. We are still in Bama for the holidays. I'm trying to get in a blog read here and there. Wishing you and Sherry a Happy New Year! Take care, Sheila